khateh ([info]khateh) wrote in [info]the_ass_fest,
2008-07-26 18:10:00
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Gift for crumbfreebread

Author: [info]sarcasticpixie
Recipient: [info]crumbfreebread
Title: By the Book
Pairing(s): Albus/Scorpius; assorted canon pairings; implied Pansy/Millicent
Summary: Scorpius Malfoy was thirteen when his parents divorced. He’d always known it would happen someday, but he didn’t expect it to be so bloody loud.
Rating: PG-13
Warning(s): Teenage erections, rampant faux-Briticisms, casual alcoholism, and an ice sculpture that may not be suitable for children.
Word Count: ~12,200
Disclaimer: All Harry Potter characters herein are the property of J.K. Rowling and Bloomsbury/Scholastic. No copyright infringement is intended.
Author's Notes: Once upon a time, this was going to be a sprawling epic with incisive commentary on friendship, sexuality, divorce, love, intergenerational divides, and materialism.

By the Book
Tags: *fic, fest: 2008 spring exchange, rating: pg-13, words: 10k+

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[info]oceaxe

July 26 2008, 16:23:10 UTC 3 years ago

That was just darling! Oh man! I loved your characterizations, and the implied pre-slash H/D was the icing on the cake. Delightful!

[info]sarcasticpixie

August 18 2008, 02:33:33 UTC 3 years ago

So glad reveals are up -- I can reply to these lovely reviews. :) Thank you!

[info]blamebrampton

July 26 2008, 16:52:32 UTC 3 years ago

I felt a certain sympathy with you, mystery author, right from your notes, and buy the end of the story I had decided it was because we could very easily hang out over cups of hot chocolate laughing at each other's jokes. This was exactly my cup of tea, from the clever use of multi-generational characters to push the narrative along, to the lovely character notes all the way through it; Albus's calm good sense was simply perfect and tremendously welcome.

Your sense of wit was so clever but delicate all the way through, even when dealing with completely unsubtle characters. Congratulations on a very well crafted and highly enjoyable story!

[info]sarcasticpixie

August 18 2008, 02:34:39 UTC 3 years ago

I felt a certain sympathy with you, mystery author, right from your notes, and buy the end of the story I had decided it was because we could very easily hang out over cups of hot chocolate laughing at each other's jokes.

You really have no idea how madly I snickered when I read this comment. :D

Thank you so much, as always!

[info]ura_hd

July 26 2008, 18:00:15 UTC 3 years ago

Cool story!

[info]sarcasticpixie

August 18 2008, 02:34:56 UTC 3 years ago

Thank you!

[info]lisa3353

July 26 2008, 18:15:26 UTC 3 years ago

That was fabulous! I loved being inside Scorpius' head and that he escaped his reality through books. I"m assuming most of us on this LJ can say the same for our own teens. Just lovely...and LOL at Draco yelling out "whore" during Astoria's wedding. The visual of that is just too funny.

[info]sarcasticpixie

August 18 2008, 02:36:02 UTC 3 years ago

I certainly think we all did, whether it was divorce or sexuality or general social anxiety... spot-on, there. Thank you for your comment!

[info]fatgirlrules

July 26 2008, 18:17:47 UTC 3 years ago

Wow, this so was so awesome. I love-Love-LOVED your Draco and Narcissa. I nearly peed myself laughing at "How is the frizzy little thing?"

You totally win. I want more.

[info]sarcasticpixie

August 18 2008, 02:36:38 UTC 3 years ago

Thank you!

There would be more if I weren't, you know, lazy and chronically procrastinating. :P

[info]alex_s9

July 26 2008, 18:55:18 UTC 3 years ago

I loved it. I loved the way Scorpius escaped into ooks after his parents' divorce, this is something I can associate with as I did the same thing. But most of all I liked the way how you justified the omission of all cliches there are in the fanfiction by simply stating this the way life looks like in books and not in real life.

And I loved your Narcissa. I'd love to be friends with her.

[info]sarcasticpixie

August 18 2008, 02:37:30 UTC 3 years ago

That was really what I was going for! And I've seen so many wonderful Narcissas, especially in this particular pairing... I had great guidance. Thank you!

[info]violetage

July 26 2008, 19:19:25 UTC 3 years ago

This fic is just made of win. Entirely made of Win with a cherry on top. Scorpius is such a lovely NOT Draco, and Al and Rose and I am becoming quite quite flaily.

Also, I love your Narcissa greatly.

[info]sarcasticpixie

August 18 2008, 02:37:49 UTC 3 years ago

Thank you so much!

[info]beatnikspinster

July 26 2008, 19:37:20 UTC 3 years ago

Oh my god. This was hysterical. The divorces were written with such humor. I love Narcissa in this. And the Harry and Draco bonding at the end. But my absolute favorite part was your Draco.

“Which is why you’re friends with Grangerspawn, I suppose. How is the frizzy little thing?”
Hahahaha! I laughed so much at this, and most things that came out of his mouth.

[info]sarcasticpixie

August 18 2008, 02:38:54 UTC 3 years ago

Thank you! I've always loved writing Draco, and it's been such a long time since I wrote him as an adult... he's ever-so-slightly delightfully bitter, isn't he? Poor thing. :D

[info]elisebanana

July 26 2008, 19:55:21 UTC 3 years ago

OMG I loved this SOOOOO much! The whole thing was very very funny, but this line:

“It’s okay if you are, you know. Your roommate looks like the retarded offspring of Celestina Warbeck and a refrigerator -- “

made me laugh so hard that my family rushed in from other parts of the house to make sure I was ok.

Mystery Author, you are a genius. I cannot wait until reveals.

[info]sarcasticpixie

August 18 2008, 02:40:12 UTC 3 years ago

Why, thank you! I will update my list of "People Who Think I Am A Genius" to include you as well as my mother. (That's pretty much the entire list, and she's been aiming to get off of it ever since I put a frozen pizza into the oven with the cardboard still on the bottom.)

[info]elisebanana

3 years ago

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[info]sarcasticpixie

3 years ago

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[info]crumbfreebread

July 26 2008, 20:27:25 UTC 3 years ago

I feel so lucky! This was all I asked for and so very much more. I love the way you characterized both Scorpius and Rose. Rose was funny and her relationship with her parents was PRICELESS, that last interaction between Hermione, Ron, Scorpius and Rose was one of my most favorite parts. Oh, Ron. You nailed him.

You really created a very detailed and fascinating world, I especially loved the way you included so many of the character's we know and love from the series, but also created such interesting personalities for the next gen characters. Little moments like when James went after the hufflepuff after Scorpius and when you hinted at Harry having a thing for luna just made me squee.

Your writing style is also brilliant. I was completely enthralled the entire time and was laughing and thoroughly entertained through out. You made the Scorpius I've wanted to see for MONTHS now. He was bound to have a bit of a messed up childhood and I LOVE the way you had him deal with that. As another reviewer said, I think a lot of us can relate to getting caught up in books all through out our teens. I also always preferred to be reading absolutely anything that wasn't assigned, even if what was assigned would eventually one day pique my interest, it was NEVER when a teacher told me it should. Buh, I just love this Scorpius. I am going to keep him forever and ever and ever.

And now, the very most excellent AS/S. AMAZING. I am really picky, but of course with fests you don't want to list a million things you hate and a million things you like, because that just isn't any fun. What is fun is finally getting to read your fic and it being so amazingly perfect like this was. The way you worked the Rose/Scorpius/Albus dynamic was the EXACT thing I had been hoping for.

Ugh, this review is so incoherent anyway, so I am just going go full out list mode and just say right out the things I loved...

I loved the way you had the families deal with their sons sexuality and interest in one another.
I LOOOOOVED Draco in this. Kind of a nut, loves his son, still definitely an annoying prat, and his moment with Harry at the end was absolutely brilliant. And how it brought the boys together. So much love for that.
Narcissa and her wily ways! The ice sculpture!
The siblings. They weren't at the forefront, but you played it so well. You gave them personalities and life without even interacting with them all that much. James got more screen time and I love what you did with him (a bit of a bully, but at moments you could see he cared about his brother) but I still got an image of Lily, as well.

Wow, I know I am leaving out tons, but I think I am going to have to read it again just to absorb all the awesomeness. I have no idea who you are but YOU ARE THE GREATEST PERSON ALIVE.

(As a little sidenote, I remember when assignments were first sent out you posted anonymously on an entry in my journal regarding my possibly moving to Germany. Well, I did it! So not only thanks for this brilliant story but you also helped me make a really huge decision, so you are a hero in my book <3<3<3)

thankyouthankyouthankyouthankyou!

[info]sarcasticpixie

August 18 2008, 02:44:49 UTC 3 years ago

Oh, I'm so glad you liked it! You really gave me some fantastic prompts to work with, and I took the idea of a strange, non-nerdy Ravenclaw Scorpius and ran with it. (I'd be lying if I said that I didn't do the same things as a teenager, and I didn't even have parental divorce as an excuse. I was just an antisocial brat.) Since he was your idea, you can certainly keep him forever and ever, although I'd like to request weekend visitation rights. :D

Thank you so much for your review, dear, and I squealed when I read that you really did go to Germany! I had to pop over to get a feel for who you were and what you might like, and take it from one chronic overachiever to another -- sometimes, you just have to experience life before you grow up. :D

[info]sirra_scribbles

July 26 2008, 20:55:27 UTC 3 years ago

Wonderfully funny! A very entertaining and excellent piece of work, Mystery Author.

[info]sarcasticpixie

August 18 2008, 02:45:17 UTC 3 years ago

Thank you! :)

[info]dora_the_nymph

July 27 2008, 00:18:45 UTC 3 years ago

Hee, this was amazing! I am totally squeeful and happy after reading this. I loved the story and I loved all the characterisations. So very awesome!

[info]sarcasticpixie

August 18 2008, 02:45:31 UTC 3 years ago

Thank you so much!

[info]anabellhenry

July 27 2008, 03:14:35 UTC 3 years ago

Hugely entertaining! Hilarious and in some cases also very sweet characterizations. And jees, who wouldn't want Narcissa for his or her grandmother?

Thank you so much for this delightful story.

[info]sarcasticpixie

August 18 2008, 02:46:15 UTC 3 years ago

I won't lie -- Narcissa? Totally inspired by my own grandmother. I wouldn't put a penile ice sculpture past her. :D

Thank you!

[info]oddishly

July 27 2008, 08:33:15 UTC 3 years ago

This is so much fun! Scorpius is brilliant. I loved the way his speech changes when drunk, and how it throws everyone off. ;) Plus, he makes one of the most convincing Ravenclaws I've ever read with his constant quoting from books - sooo much love for the other characters always bringing that up in despairing and/or bemused tones. His escape into books is delightfully written and endearing. (Loved the drama of running out books - so horrible when that happens *g*)
Their kiss was gorgeous - so funny that Scorpius always expected a warm room, inside, with a radiator etc, and gets instead the passion-and-drama-in-pouring-rain kiss that gets written about. :)
Oh, and Albus was great, too. He's so calm and level-headed, which makes the scene where he finds Scorpius at night all the more wonderful, in losing all semblence of articulation.
Really, really great fic. Thank you for sharing!

[info]sarcasticpixie

August 18 2008, 02:47:43 UTC 3 years ago

Thank you so much! Poor, pretentious Scorpius, with his Goethe and magical physics. Hopefully, Al can straighten him out.

Luckily, we have fanfic, so we'll never really run out of things to read around here. :D

[info]pikkalam_sri

July 27 2008, 15:52:27 UTC 3 years ago

Shhh... you had me at "ice sculpture." Excellent fic - playful, yet well-constructed. What you did with Draco and Astoria was very amusing. Actually, all of your characterizations were great. Well done :)

[info]sarcasticpixie

August 18 2008, 02:48:36 UTC 3 years ago

Thank you!

In a way, I would like to take the ice sculpture out of the fictional realm and put it right in the middle of my office. I'm always up for freaking out clients...

[info]jackieohno

July 27 2008, 18:13:37 UTC 3 years ago

I thoroughly enjoyed reading this fic--it was engaging, funny and very charming. And the boys were just adorable, especially Scorpius.

[info]sarcasticpixie

August 18 2008, 02:48:53 UTC 3 years ago

Thank you so much!

[info]lire_casander

July 27 2008, 22:36:20 UTC 3 years ago

Let me quote my fave line... My dad saved the world and my mother saved women’s Quidditch. As if my life was ever going to be remotely normal in the first place.

Oh, man, it was hilarious, the development works and the love story is perfect!

[info]sarcasticpixie

August 18 2008, 02:49:19 UTC 3 years ago

I was particularly pleased after writing that one, myself. :) Thank you so much!

[info]meredyth_13

July 28 2008, 01:18:35 UTC 3 years ago

Bloody marvellous! Scorpius hiding from his world in books, and Al - well, Al is so amazingly grounded, for all that he's going through. I love how he really does has Scorpius all figured out, and himself for the most part. Just beautiful!

And the image of Harry and Draco, drunk and bitter and loud? Perfect!

Oh, poor boys! But they have found each other, and in the end that's all that matters.

This one has gone into the keeper file!

[info]sarcasticpixie

August 18 2008, 02:50:17 UTC 3 years ago

Thank you so much!

Now, we just have to hope their makeout session isn't interrupted by Harry and Draco drunkenly blasting off fireworks that spell out rude words.

[info]whimseywisp

July 28 2008, 02:54:24 UTC 3 years ago

This was so hilarious that when I read

“Ron, stop it, he’s gay and terrified of you,” her mother chides him. “Scorpius, you can give Rose her glass back. Make her take it like a woman.”

I actually knocked over a glass of water, and then quickly had to move a bunch of stuff out of the way. The reception scene is SO HILARIOUS. And I adore Narcissa so much. I also love Rose forever, especially her line

“Being your beard’s already gotten me into an open-bar society wedding. A sun-soaked holiday might inspire me to fake a pregnancy scare and drive the point home.”

*snortgiggle* I loved your Ravenclaw!Scorpius and all of the book references and everything, everything. Also, drunk!Harry and Draco yelling "BITCHES" is a classic.

[info]sarcasticpixie

August 18 2008, 02:51:33 UTC 3 years ago

Thank you! I hope I didn't inadvertently cause any permanent water damage! On second thought, I'll blame it on Ron. I've known the boy was going to be violently protective of his offspring as soon as I finished the first damn book. :D

[info]ritalavalerie

July 28 2008, 11:57:28 UTC 3 years ago

This was just what I needed! So funny and witty and... I loved everything in this fic! Especially the Harry/Draco interaction, I just couldn't stop laughing. And the sculpture! GOD xD

[info]sarcasticpixie

August 18 2008, 02:51:47 UTC 3 years ago

Thank you! :D

[info]snottygrrl

July 28 2008, 17:51:14 UTC 3 years ago

nicely done, quite an enjoyable read (you'll have to excuse my short comment, i seem to be jet lagged, but it doesn't lessen my appreciation of the story).

[info]sarcasticpixie

August 18 2008, 02:51:58 UTC 3 years ago

Thank you very much!

[info]pingrid

July 28 2008, 17:53:39 UTC 3 years ago

I thoroughly enjoyed this fic! :D Your wit and humour keeps it light all the way through, and yet you have some wonderful observations about the nature of the characters. My very favourite is this bit:

“My dad saved the world and my mother saved women’s Quidditch. As if my life was ever going to be remotely normal in the first place.”

“It’s okay,” Scorpius says, yawning. “My grandfather let the Dark Lord stay in our guest suite. Grandmother still likes to say that we’re the Claridge’s of evil.”

Hahah! Yep, that's them screwed up for life right there. :) Draco's barbed tongue was a lot of fun, and I love your Narcissa too. Thanks for this!

[info]sarcasticpixie

August 18 2008, 02:53:23 UTC 3 years ago

Thank you so much!

God, I hope Narcissa hired a decent interior decorator and restoration committee after the final battle. Evil monomania is NEVER good for property values.

[info]azurelunatic

July 28 2008, 20:10:42 UTC 3 years ago

This makes me happy and squeeful.

[info]sarcasticpixie

August 18 2008, 02:53:37 UTC 3 years ago

Thank you! :)

[info]tomatoe18

July 29 2008, 05:39:43 UTC 3 years ago

His father is Dickens’ Charles Darnay, of course, with a bit of Bronte’s Heathcliff thrown in for good measure. He loves his grandmother, but she’s Scarlett O’Hara down to the bone. Mother has been and always will be Becky Sharp. Rosie could never be anyone other than Elizabeth Bennet, and her brother, the round and doddering Hugo, is a perfect Mr. Collins.

Well put, Mystery Author. :D I am giving this fic a top score just for all the literature references.

Other than that, this was hilarious. Scorpius' voice throughout the fic was too amusing for words. I actually ROFLMAO-ed. XD There were so many amazing parts that I'd love to point out but that would be like throwing the whole story back at you because... well, everything was wonderful!

I love how it was Astoria who got picked on for once, instead of Ginny, and I love reading about her. And Narcissa... what a winner. I love her. I love everyone. Even James and his pies. Thanks for writing a bit of Harry and Draco craziness too. I liked their interaction and how they embarrassed Albus. The almost kiss in the end nearly killed me. They were so close. But I love the promise of more. Bravo!

[info]sarcasticpixie

August 18 2008, 02:55:13 UTC 3 years ago

Why, thank you! I am the worst type of literature aficionado -- I took juuuuuuuust enough English lit courses in college and grad school to convince myself that I know a thing or two when in actuality I end up sounding like a total jackass. There was a LOT of Wikipedia cross-referencing here. :P

[info]picklevictory

July 29 2008, 11:47:02 UTC 3 years ago

This was absolutely wonderful.

[info]sarcasticpixie

August 18 2008, 02:55:25 UTC 3 years ago

Thank you!
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